i can't sleep

i'm so happy with the new look of my blog. these past few days, i've been in front of my laptop, revamping my blog just to kill time. i wanted to enjoy my unemployment era as much as i can. it's fun, but the moment i realize there's no money in my bank account, the pressure starts to take over my mind and i begin to feel stressed.

i feel like venting out, especially about how i feel like a burden to my parents. but i think what i feel is a bit too personal to overshare here. all i can say is that i've tried my best applying for jobs. i can only think positively so as not to let it bother me too much to the point it can drives me insane. but, even though i try, i can't help but to think about it so much. particularly about how in two years, i will be twenty-five. time is going fast, and everyone is moving on. it's linear though our experience in life is not. no matter in what dire situation you're in, if you don't get up fast enough, you're left behind. that's exactly how i feel nowadays.

a lot of people may have felt the same way i do and have been in the same place at one point in their life, so that thought brings me some kind of relief knowing that i am not alone. the difference now is, they eventually got through it and are now at a different stage in life. this leaves me wondering, when i will reach that point, how long will it take, and will i be strong enough to wait and persevere?

 and so, i thought, it's best to leave everything to Allah. the Almighty and the Most Merciful.